“I swear by myself, declares the Lord, that because you have done this…I will surely bless you.” (Genesis 22:15-19)
My mind and heart have been pondering on trusting God and the conflict of no joy while trusting. I trust God in what He has asked of me in this coming year, but, there is a dull ache inside still. If I trust Him, I should be joyful, right? I should be excited of what is to come, right? However, this is not the case. I have found myself irritable and not very joyful at all. But I am encouraged by Abraham; when God told him to go– he trusted God, but there is no word of him rejoicing when he and Isaac set out that morning. All that is written is the most important lesson of all—Abrahams prompt obedience. This was only a test from God; a very extreme test might I add. However, Abraham feared the Lord and did as he was told.
This past summer there was no word when God told me to give Him a year of the end blessing and reward. And today I may still not be rejoicing but I am awakened that too many times we focus on the blessing rather the goal of God alone. “At any cost, by any road means nothing self-chosen in the way God brings us to the goal.” Oswald Chambers. God knows I would not have chosen this road, as He is still working on me. Where are you today? Does this hit home with you? Are you focusing more on the blessing or God alone? Maybe the blessing is God alone, and not what we would choose for ourselves. I still need some chiseling to grasp that one, as I know what my heart desires on this earth. And this morning I was on my knees asking the Lord…but this is not the goal, nor the lesson God wants to teach me right now. But, I know He cares for our desires that run rampant in our hearts–never doubt that. But, I am certain He desires our full devotion to Him first.